Monday, August 17, 2009

Quality Time....For Parents!

Here are several ways of making quality time for the marriage as well as helping children understand that Mom and Dad's relationship is numero uno. Single parents: These apply to you, too!

1. Don't allow children to interrupt your conversations. Make them wait their turn. preferably in another room. Say, "We'll let you know when we are finished talking." A child who simply "can't wait" probably needs five minutes of cool down time in his/her room.

2. Create a weekly "Parents' Night Out" and don't let anything except acts of God
interfere with the commitment. Every now and then, go off for a week end without the kids. They need to realize that the marriage is a separate and autonomous entity within the family with a life and needs of its own.

3. Put the children to bed early. Remember that your children's bedtime is for yor benefit. In other words, determine how much down time you need in the evening during which you have no child-rearing responsibilities and set bedtimes accordingly. Eight is late enough for pre-schoolers, and eight thirty for grade-school age. Older children should be in their rooms no later than nine, particularly on school nights.

Once the kids are in bed, reduce distractions that interfere with communication and intimacy. Agree not to do either housework or office work after the kids' bedtime. Spend this time getting back in touch with the feelings that led to your original commitment. The worst possible and least creative thing you can do is get in the habit of centering your time together in the evenings around television.

From: "The New Parent Power"..Dr John Rosemond

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